The Struggles of Novice Creators−Perfectionism
In 2009, the world seemed to turn its wheels as access to stable and affordable home-internet exploded in Tier 2 cities of urban India, and shrunk the global world of ideas. Time and energy being the only constraints, if navigated, one could spend a lifetime reading any number of articles on any given subject through the medium called blogs.
I read them like a ravenously hungry street orphan, stealing, afraid that what I was consuming would be my last meal. I did what many Indians would have done − I copy-pasted interesting articles on MS Word documents and archived them carefully in my elaborate seventeen categories of interest. What if I wanted to read this later? What if I wouldn't be able to find this later? I operated out of a scarcity framework. It took a few years to stop the habit of hoarding information, realizing it was here to stay.
Slowly, I was inspired to start a blog of my own. Being social-media shy and yet having an urge to say something to the world, I decided to embark, rather reluctantly, on the blogging world. This was a daring step to enter the new world of the brave.
After going through the frightening process of setting up a blog, I did my best to write a weekly post. The process of generating a unique idea, developing an argument, illustrating appropriately, and getting the grammar right was tedious. Worse, I hated publicizing it. Notwithstanding, even I, started having a few committed readers.
Though I got marginally better at the craft, my writing came to a screeching halt in two months. I was struck by the un-documented misery of being a new creator.
Many novice creators are soon plunged into a complex paralysis. They soon realize that they lack the class, skills, focused niche, and value possessed by the seasoned creators.
This leads them to pause and study more so that their contribution could be pegged at a higher bar in their field of interest. Such a pause, unfortunately, also often causes them to:
consider how they might actually be better at something else
get lost in the sea of details in their field of interest...further leading to a sink in confidence
hopelessly observe the gap widening between them and their heroes
lose interest and wonder whether they prematurely waded into the creator economy
A look at this list strings together a pattern lurking in the shadows. It reveals the biggest obstacle that afflicts a novice. It is a terminal illness called perfectionism.
It paralyzes the aspiring creator to not only observe their lack in generating original and significant content, but also shines a torch into other craters in their aspirational work like delivery, medium of choice, production quality, etc.
They expect their very first poem to have the lyrical spell of Byron and the mass popularity of Frost. They insist on refining their intellectual and technical aspects of their craft and only then perform, crushed by the many polished creations on any given topic bursting on the internet.
Perfectionism forces them to be in a perpetual concoction of discontentment, uncertainty, comparison, and if still motivated, a state of study.
I have fallen into this trap several times over. I desire to be as literate as possible in my field of interest and desire to create masterpieces.
Every. Single. Time.
This is a death choke to the creator. In fact, perfectionism has stolen over a decade of creation from me. But only I am to blame as I handed over the key of my creative pursuits to the thief of perfectionism.
The way out is to remember that no one is and can be perfect. NO ONE. It is the most deceptive illusion in front of the novice creator. One would be petty to think that they are going to be the first perfect creator.
Brian Johnson of the Optimize (Philosopher's Notes 2.0) fame says that perfectionists are those who have exceptionally high standards and that it is important to have those high standards.
He claims that there are two kinds of perfectionists- the unhealthy kind and the healthy kind. The unhealthy kind are those who have super-high standards but reject the various constraints of reality (time, money, energy, other life commitments, etc.). The healthy kind maintain the same high-standards but accepts the constraints of reality. Because of their pragmatism, the persevere with an incremental optimization approach.
At any given point, they are fully conscious of the constraints they are up against, and they diligently factor them as they make their plans towards the ideal. For the healthy perfectionist (let's call them 'Optimalist'...a term I borrow), the ideal goal acts only as a 'guiding star' directing their journey and not necessarily as a definite 'shore' to land upon.
The Optimalist works within their constraints everyday and inches towards the ideal. They are not distressed by the constraints but they embrace reality. They do not struggle with negativity towards them but accept them as part of life.
The perfectionist wants to control their environment in order to perform their ideal. But the Optimalist plans, factoring reality, and acts with intention, aiming for incremental progress, allowing life to thrive holistically, on a daily basis.
My advice (as one starting over): Get out there and do the work of creating. Don't fret over quality (production or aesthetics) and significance. The very act of creating is to be treated as most sacred. Quality, then, follows as a distant second in priority (a second nevertheless) in the scheme of things. Thankfully, quality emerges with the quantum of creation itself.
The necessary criteria for a creator is to create. Should this basic act be ignored, they will never be creators. The ritual comes first. Quantum over quality. Weight over substance. Frequency over significance.
Perfectionism is a terminal illness; a death choke. It paralyzes. And it kills.
The very act of consistently creating will eventually build creation muscles, thought process, product understanding, and passion. The more one creates, the sooner the myth of perfectionism will be dispelled. Like fungus, it will thrive in the dark. Consistently shine the light of creation, and it dies.